Wednesday, February 28, 2007

%&*#$^@ Traffic Court

Can we have a moment for how I have to drive to Algiers now, to the permanently "temporary" traffic court? Can we have a moment for the fact that I'm only going to set up a court date to contest my speeding ticket, which means that going to Algiers today only gains me the privilege of having to go to Algiers again in two weeks? Can we have a moment for the fact that you used to be able to set a court date on the internet or over the phone, but the system has been broken since Katrina? How about a moment for me asking the officer where I had to go, because I know perfectly well that the Broad Street traffic court has been closed since Katrina, and him cutting me off and droning, "Just follow the instructions on the back of your ticket, ma'am." WHICH ARE INCORRECT. As is most of the information on the City of New Orleans' website, until you click the dropdown menu instead of the side menu, and then this semi-hidden page miraculously appears telling you that traffic court is now in Algiers. Can we have a moment for how you can only pay in cash? Or how you can still plead guilty over the website, but if you want to contest your ticket, the instructions are vague and the process is so much of a pain in the ass that I'm tempted to just send them $350 (except... not). Can we have a moment for the phone number for traffic court being not in service? And, last but not least, this piece of hilarity that a Google search turned up?

Let us all be silent and have a moment. Thanks.

Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Dominoes in Oblivion

I am inordinately entertained by this video. Someone balanced three minutes worth of books on their spines in the game and knocked them over like dominoes. It's hilarious. The physics are pretty cool in the game-- you can knock things off a table if you bump into it, for instance. It's kind of a pain in the butt sometimes. I bought a house (well, a shack, because it was all I could afford) to keep my junk in while I am out thieving, and when I tried to stack all my outfits on the table they kept bumping into each other and falling off.

It would be pretty nearly impossible to set up dominoes like that in Oblivion without using an editor.

Tags:

Monday, February 26, 2007

Window Cats

I love how, after waking me up a full hour before I meant to be up, my cats have totally moved on to hanging out in their respective windows, quietly watching birds. What brats. Jolee is standing up on the chair with his paws on the armrest. Starbuck is perched on top of a couch cushion. I can hear a lot of bird noises outside. Jolee in particular loves this bunch of doves that hang out in the eaves of the house next door in the mornings. If he hears them making their dove noises before the blinds are open, he will hop up next to me on the bed and paw at the blinds until I open them so he can see "his" doves.

My cats are not as aloof as they think they are. For one thing, they have this thing where they have to hang out in the room I'm in. So since I'm on my laptop having coffee, they're in the living room. If I get up and go into the office to play a couple minutes of Oblivion (really, a couple), they'll gravitate in there. And then they'll glare at me if I try to pet them like it's a total coincidence that they're there. OK, fine, when I say "they," I mean Jolee. Starbuck will crawl all over me with her pointy little kitten feet. She doesn't really have that cat resentment thing going on yet-- that dirty look they give you when they're SO BUSY sleeping, licking themselves, staring into space, etc., that they can't be bothered being petted.

Yesterday my friend Marissa ran the Mardi Gras Marathon, and went promptly to Bourbon Street to celebrate upon completing it. After I got out of work, I met them down there, which somehow led to the rather unique "only in New Orleans" experience of us ending up in Rick's Cabaret at 7 PM on a Sunday. Strip clubs are apparently not happening places on Sunday evenings, in case you couldn't guess. Mike complained that there was only one hot girl in the whole place, but I thought her fake boobs were a little scary. There was totally a line down one side. Things didn't even MOVE! They looked like hard plastic with skin stretched over them. But you could tell the girl worked out, from her arms and upper back, and the rest of her body was awesome. Too bad she didn't keep the B's she was born with (or A's, C's, whatever). She would have looked better.

I like my B's. I don't believe in women changing themselves to fit some ideal that men made up. Men don't have boobs. Therefore they should have no say.

Saturday, February 24, 2007

Where, oh Where, Are the Good Clothes in Oblivion?

I am currently about 12 hours into the game, and here I am already checking out mods. It doesn't mean I'm bored with the game-- I'm just a sucker for mods, little downloadable player-made things that enhance the experience. I'm not too happy with the clothes I've found so far, for one thing. I'd like a couple of tattoos. And there's this strange quirk programmed into the game that doesn't let me wear pants because I'm a female character. What I mean is, there are several items of clothing in the game that "morph" to fit your character's gender. Like you'll kill a guy who's wearing "breeches," but when you put them on, they're suddenly a skirt. Now, the weird thing is, it's only some of the pants in game. For instance, I can wear the laced leather pants or the blacksmith pants. This wouldn't be so much of a problem if the skirts weren't really heinous. Unsurprisingly, there are mods out there that fix this-- what did surprise me was the number of guys who were upset about not being able to put the skirts on their male characters. I guess they wanted to be able to rock the samurai style. Anyway, that's easily fixed.

I also wanted to check out the different body mods, just to see what people are making. I don't know, I don't see much of a problem with the original female body. It's a little blocky, which is somewhat annoying. Also, in some of the outfits, the breasts appear oddly pointy. I'm not a fan of the Madonna cone bra look myself. (You can sort of see what I'm talking about at right, but I didn't really have any good shots to illustrate what I mean.)

I did a quick search to see what alternative body meshes were out there. (Warning: Nudity in the links. There. You were warned.) A quick search brings up this one. This is Corwyn's Fantasy Figure, which, as far as I know, is only an alpha, not a final release. Still, there are some clothes out there available for it, and it's a good illustration of the point I want to make here. Check out the huge, abnormally highly placed boobs. I'll give him some credit for giving her hips and making her lower body curvy. But there's something distinctly iffy about the pubic area, and the way the breasts sit.

Eshme's Bodies and Clothes seems to be the most popular one. This one was made by an actual female, and it appears realistic to me. The pubes are actually in the right spot (don't laugh-- I've looked through these mods, and they're mostly made by guys), and the breasts look realistic. This could be a real female body. In fact, she looks very similar to my build, with a slightly larger chest. It's not ludicrously large, though, which is a good thing, because the body is skinny. Really skinny. The vast majority of clothing mods out there are designed for this particular body. So why not download this one, and get some cool clothes?

Two reasons. First, I mentioned that the Eshme body looks similar to my build... in a roleplaying game this is flat-out the opposite of what I want and what's realistic. Why? In the game I play a swordswoman, for crying out loud. I carry a giant two-hander that weighs 40 pounds. My real life build certainly can't support that weight, but my character's build had better be able to. In a roleplaying game, it should be about avoiding things that take the player out of the experience. Waif-like warriors aren't realistic; they're ridiculous. In KOTOR II, there's a part where, if you're a female character, you have to put on a dancing girl outfit, similar to Leia's metal bra, to get past a nasty Hutt. Except that when you put it on, the designers made it so your waist morphs into this absurdly extreme hourglass shape. You don't even look like the same person. I could only roll my eyes at that. It definitely took me out of the game.

Second, go have a look at the outfits modders are making for female characters. Thayet would not be caught dead in "armor" that exposed her stomach and nipples. She'd put a blade through your throat for suggesting such a thing. I've discovered today that it's very difficult to find anyone making good clothes for a) the original body mesh, and b) gamers who want their characters to wear clothing appropriate for the time period and setting. Aren't those peasants and soldiers going to look at me funny if I go running around in a leopard catsuit and heels? It's not like I'm asking for a lot here. A couple of retextured dresses? Cool looking pants that female characters can wear? I wouldn't be opposed to a sleeveless shirt that I can wear with pants when I'm thieving around. I wouldn't even be opposed to a midriff-baring vest if it doesn't look completely out of place. I like to look cute and bad-ass at the same time. I just don't want to look like something out of a cheesy S&M fantasy.

Whatev. I'm not entirely graphically incompetent. Maybe I'll just do it myself.

Friday, February 23, 2007

The Apocalypse Has Already Happened. We Know. We Were There

Or, the post-Katrina update on what's happening in our fair city.

Lord. Where to start. The first thing you should know about post-Katrina New Orleans is that, while things are vastly better than they were when I moved back a little over a year ago, they aren't as good as the rest of the country assumes they are.

No real, centralized plan has emerged, and now, a year and a half later, it seems unlikely that one will. I think the window for that has passed. People who wanted to come back did, and they're dealing with their shit themselves. There will be no vast restructuring or replanning of the city, which is too bad, because it seems like an opportunity missed. It seems like there could have been a new, exciting initiative, and then the enthusiasm petered out and the moment passed and people were left doing the same thing they were doing all along, which was doing it for themselves. The sad thing is, the demographic most affected by Katrina was the low-income and elderly. I guess they're left to fend for themselves, too. This might explain why so many people elected to just leave it all behind. Can you imagine starting over at the age of eighty, after perhaps saving for sixty years so you could finally pay off your house? And then your insurance company makes up some B.S. excuse to not pay out, and you can't afford to hire an attorney, so you get... nothing. Which is what's left of eighty years of your life. Nothing.

But someone, at some point, is going to realize we can't have blocks upon blocks of blighted, abandoned properties. Maybe then a plan will spring up. Or maybe we'll just be living amongst miles of urban blight for the next twenty years. It's not a very optimistic view, but I haven't seen anything out of the leadership that gives a person reason to hope. For one thing, the federal money? Those billions of dollars? Where the hell is it? Actual people aren't getting that money. From what I've read about the Road Home grant process, it's a joke. You fill out all this crap, only to have a computer spit out a piece of paper informing you that you can have 100 bucks. Whoo. Like that's going to rebuild a house.

Is the city hoarding the money then? Well, judging from the fact that there are car-sized potholes that the city can't afford to fill in and streetlights that have been dead for a year and a half, I'm going to have to conclude that they haven't seen any of that money either. The city can't afford to repair any of their facilities, hire enough police officers, or keep order during a rampant crime wave. Oh, and the pumps. No one seems to care that over half of the pump system is still offline, in a city that lies below sea level. Last month it rained for 24 hours and there was knee-deep water in the streets. Because this has devolved into a pretty negative rant on the State of New Orleans, I will throw out there that the new trash company is awesome. It was the cleanest Mardi Gras I've seen, and they are actually taking our trash consistently on a weekly basis. (For those of you in other cities, this concept is probably like, "So? Of course the trash gets picked up." But things like the trash getting picked up do not happen here post-Katrina. Just a small illustration of the crap that people have learned to put up with here.)

The second thing to be aware of is that we aren't talking about localized destruction here. You can drive through blocks upon blocks of... nothing. I don't mean after the storm you could. I mean today, right now, you could hop in the car and do so. Some of the houses still have the furniture sitting inside, covered in a layer of caked mud and dust. Katrina prompted a mass exodus of hundreds of thousands of people, which has not happened in the United States to that large a scale since the Civil War. I can understand why people are angry at the fraud that happened during Katrina... but you have to realize that was FEMA (I think we've all seen exactly how efficient that organization turned out to be), not us. It seems like all the media coverage is negative, and it frustrates me that people read these news stories about a few bad eggs among HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS of people and say, "Well, don't send any more of my tax dollars to help 'those people.'"

Let me tell you what it was like, because I am not sure people understand what really went down. We had a car and were able to drive out on the last day. We didn't leave until they announced it was a Category 5, so we had very little time to pack our stuff. We were grad students, so we didn't have money saved. It's not hard to imagine that others didn't, either. Now picture being in a hotel (we weren't in a hotel, but many people were), and then the news filtering in that you won't be able to go back into the city-- as in, there are armed military people at checkpoints keeping you out-- for one month. How do you pay? What do you do? If FEMA hadn't acted fast and direct deposited that first $2,000, I certainly wouldn't have been able to make it. And I didn't have a carload of kids, pets, elderly parents, or other dependents relying on me. So the negativity of the coverage grates on me. Yes, money was wasted. But it is a fraction of the amount of money wasted in Iraq. (I would dig up the statistic, but I can't be bothered. So just think about it.) And if I was the leadership of the U.S., I would be embarrassed to have other countries look at us and think in their heads that we're quick to push the ideals of democracy on others, yet we don't seem to care about people within our own borders. New Orleans was left out of the State of the Union address for two years running. That certainly tells me where George W. Bush's priorities are.

To the right is the Ninth Ward, taken from the bridge. You can see here the new levee wall built by the Army Corps of Engineers (click and enlarge). Note that this "new" levee does not actually provide protection beyond the level of the old levee. This means it's just as inadequate, should the same storm hit again. We have all these promises of Category 5 protection, but is anyone making sure it's delivered? We don't get a sense of who's on that. Is anyone on that? Shouldn't they be? The picture to the right was taken in late November. See the field to the right of the levee? That wasn't a field in the summer of 2005. It was a neighborhood, rows of houses. You can drive through and see the paved driveways leading to nothing. In New Orleans, they call it the Federal Flood. Which brings me to the third thing I'm not sure people know-- this field of brown grass where houses used to be, it wasn't caused by an unstoppable force of nature. It was caused by human error. Really, do people know that? Because you read all these editorials where people are like, "See? It snowed/tornadoed/stormed/flooded here and we aren't demanding money!" Yes, Katrina would have caused billions of dollars in wind damage on its own. But the catastrophic flooding that caused the majority of the 1,500 casualties? It was the shoddy construction of the levee built by the Army Corps of Engineers. Of course they aren't liable, because you can't sue the federal government. So really, when people here demand help from the federal government, we aren't being greedy. We just want them to clean up their mess. Because it is their mess.

So, to refresh: This city does not trust the federal government. People don't seem to trust governor Kathleen Blanco either, though most of the ire is directed toward George Bush and Ray Nagin. When someone says they saw Nagin, the mayor, out somewhere, 9 out of 10 times someone will bust out with, "You did? Wait, you saw him? Where?" This is because he's frustrated people with his tendency to lay low and go silent for months on end. It pisses people off, as does the fact that he bought a house in Dallas after the storm. I remain baffled as to who, exactly, re-elected him, because no one seems to want him around. Crime is way up in the city, and population is down. Maybe if there weren't so many abandoned, deserted houses, there wouldn't be such rampant crime. But again, no one has a plan for that land. We're sort of in limbo here. Still, every day a new store opens. Every day a dumpster appears on the street, and a house is gutted, the contents of someone's old life tossed in the bin for the world to see. Every day a house gets torn down, a basement gets sheetrocked. The Hispanic population is booming, and there are taco trucks parked on the corners selling lunch to the workers. Stores are actually open 24 hours again, because there are enough people to work in them. So it goes.

I have opinions on what's going on in the city, but I'm not as up on current events as many New Orleans bloggers. Really, you want to go read Wet Bank Guide for that, because he does a far better job than me. I'm sorry that this turned into more of a rant than an update. The whole Katrina thing tends to bring that out in me. Now I'm off to take a shower and go for Thai. Because the fact that there is Thai food means the city is probably going to make it. Oh! And I nearly forgot my plug: in spite of the eight paragraphs of rant appearing above, I should mention that the French Quarter is fine, as is the Garden District. So basically, everything you would want to see as a tourist is still there, except the streetcars, so you'll probably want to stay downtown rather than on St. Charles. None of the tourist areas were flooded, and the other damage is mostly repaired. If you come today, you will see the same architecturally and culturally unique city you saw before the storm. The city is up and running for tourism, so please tell everyone you know. The city desparately needs the tourist dollars (I know, I know, as a waitress they wouldn't do me any harm either).

Stop... the Banging... Stop

I guess it could have been worse. But seriously, was it necessary to start sheetrocking the basement at 6:30 AM the day after Mardi Gras? It's not like any work has been done on the damn basement in, oh I don't know, the last ENTIRE YEAR. Let's start the day the entire city is experiencing a weeklong hangover and needs sleep. That was a great idea. And I realize that the world doesn't revolve around late-working late-sleeping people like me. I get this.

However. Before 7 is a bit much. Even Mike's alarm doesn't go off until 7:30. Don't you think before 7 borders on ridiculous? I dealt with it for awhile this morning, drifting in and out of sleep, before giving in and getting up at 8:30. Starbuck was crawling all over my chest with her little feet anyway.

I am not even going to start on the smell of cigarettes that wafts upward from the hole in our floor and into our bathroom hallway. I am just not.

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Happy Mardi Gras! (We're Passed Out)

What separates this...
... from this?

The answer: about 12 hours. We were up at 7:30 AM to catch Zulu, and managed to go until about 8:30 PM before everyone abruptly lost the will to live. The plan was to shower, rally, and go to the Quarter to watch the mounted police shut down Mardi Gras at midnight... but we didn't manage to motivate further than the living room floor.

If you've wondered where I've been for the last several days, this is where. I've been straight alternating between work, parades, and sleep since Friday. My feet hurt, I am covered in dirt, and I drank Bailey's and coffee this morning before I even had breakfast. Happy Mardi Gras, y'all. Happy Mardi Gras.

Friday, February 16, 2007

Obliviate!

I believe "obliviate" in Harry Potter refers to the spell that wipes out people's memories. I'm going to add an auxiliary definition. Obliviate (v.)-- to play The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion for hours, to the exclusion of other aspects of non-computer a.k.a. "real" life. If you haven't played this game, I am here to say that it is THAT COOL. Technically, I haven't even played yet today. I just spent an hour going to various scenic spots and snapping screenshots of my character. Here she is. Her name is Thayet. She's a Redguard custom class (involving a mix of swords and thievery). At the moment I'm about 4 hours into the game and still on Level 1. I haven't taken any quests, nor have I spent much time in any cities or talked to many people.

What exactly have I been doing in the game? Well, I walked out of the Imperial sewers and into the wild world for the first time. Let me tell you, it was a moment. First of all, the world is moving. What I mean by that is there is grass blowing in the wind, and a blue butterfly hovers around you. The sun was setting (time passes in this game, albeit at a much quicker rate than actual time, and there is weather), the music swelled around me, and I scrolled back the mouse to get a larger look. There I was standing next to a river, across which there were hills spotted with trees and mountains in the distance. I was still enjoying the moment when the stars began to come out, and I was delighted to discover that there were two moons. I had no idea what to do next. In this game, you don't have to follow the main quest because there is so much stuff to do. I wanted to look at things, I wanted to explore.

So I took a running leap off the dock, swam across the river, and took off for those mountains. Because it seemed like the thing to do. If you were there, you'd understand. View Thayet's photos so far... warning: of interest to probably no one else except me. :-)

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Happy Birthday, Jolee!

It's not really his birthday, but I'm going to call it his birthday because this is the day I adopted him one year ago. This is a picture of him in the shelter. They called him Mr. Bitey because, well, you can imagine. The attitude-y expression on his face is actually very him. He's come a long way in a year. Jolee is my first personal cat. I had cats growing up, but he is the first one I've had in my own apartment and taken care of by myself. I take being Jolee's person very seriously... because I'm his only person. He will tolerate being touched by other people, but they unnerve him and he tries to inch away. Whereas, with me, he will prowl around and headbutt me and smile his purring smile. So he truly is my cat. And this is his birthday. We'll say he's five. Who knows, he could be five. It's a nice round number. Happy birthday, my kittiest. May you strew balls of white fluff across the carpet for many, many years to come.

More Tornado

I'm not about to walk over there with my camera and check it out because it would be horribly disrespectful and tacky, but here are some photos from the Times Picayune of the damage in the Carrollton area this morning. This is one mile from our apartment. I can hear a lot of sirens from my house, going back and forth. Apparently we are lucky to have power, because a whole chunk of Uptown on the other side of Tulane from us, up through Mid City, is knocked out and they're saying it will be days. Eerily, just like after Katrina, it is a gorgeous day outside, 75 and sunny with a bit of a breeze gusting through still.

I had seven or eight phone calls this morning while I was at work. So yes, I AM okay. It was a mile away and we didn't even have wind damage here. I somehow slept through the whole thing. It hit around 3:00 AM, and I had passed out at 1:30 after working a double shift, so I was dead to the world. Apparently people further away than us heard the tornado, but I missed it. Don't ask me how I managed to miss hail. (I slept through an earthquake once my junior year at St. Lawrence. What can I say? I like my sleep.) I feel very sorry for these people, many of whom probably just spent hundreds of thousands of dollars fixing their houses after Katrina.



Right, Sweetie

So Mike is always making fun of me because I actually feel danger whenever there are massive tornado warnings and the sky turns a pale shade of yellow-green. He claims that we are in the middle of an urban area and therefore we're safe, because there are buildings all around and tornados only go to open spots. Hence Kansas constantly getting hit with them.

Well.

A tornado apparently touched down at Burdette and Freret Streets last night. This is approximately 16 blocks away from our house, on the other side of Tulane. In fact, I was driving through this area three hours earlier, because I gave an undergrad without a car a ride home from work. It started to rain shortly after I got home.

If a tornado can touch down a mile away, it can touch down here. I rest my case. So there. I'm going to hide under the furniture next time.

Monday, February 12, 2007

My Left Shoulder Is Dead

Long live my left shoulder.

Two weeks ago I also had problems with this shoulder. It really pisses me off, because I worked Saturday night, Sunday afternoon, and I work both shifts today in what is essentially a 10-12 hour day. This is the wrong point in my week for my shoulder to be in uncomfortable, unsleepable pain. I am going to have to take some of those pills at work, which are a dubious brand of generic pill called "Pain Zapper," whose most notable and redeeming quality is that they have a warning label stating that one dose contains caffeine equivalent or greater than one entire cup of coffee. Sometimes I am tempted to pop a couple of those pills for a quick pick-me-up. I am definitely going to need a few today to get through work.

I don't know what's wrong with my left shoulder, or how I did it. I suspect I pulled something. Again. But I really don't want to work a double today. Last week they gave me this B.S. about needing to keep me on during my break, even though usually I go home for two or three hours. It was total B.S., because they didn't need me, I made about $12, and I was miserable. I'm putting my foot down if they try to pull that today. I couldn't get in a good position all night, the cats woke me up by wrestling on my feet, and that computer still isn't here. Apparently when you pay extra for 2-day shipping, what you really get is 7-day shipping. If it doesn't get here in the next 10 minutes, it will get here this afternoon and I won't be here to sign for it. So we won't get the damn thing till Wednesday. All of these things are things that piss me off on this crappy Monday morning. I had to vent.

Sunday, February 11, 2007

Friday, February 9, 2007

Waking Up the Food

I think the cutest, yet most annoying, few minutes of my day occur in the mornings when my cats contrive to wake me up. This morning Starbuck was curled up next to me, sort of nestled above my hip. Jolee hopped onto the bed and stalked up my other side. He flopped with both paws on my chest and started to purr. Starbuck is very cute in a kitten way, but she cannot compete with Jolee for sheer plush, furry, gorgeousness. I think it's because his face and eyes are so round, and when he is happy he almost has a smile. Also, Starbuck jumps around going, "Mrrp! Mrrp! Love! Love!" all day. Jolee bestows his love a little more discriminatingly. Anyway, they prowled and sprawled and circled around me like a pride of mini-lions until I got up and gave them some dry food.

Starbuck has this funny habit, and I wonder if it's a kitten thing that she'll outgrow, of squeaking when she jumps down from furniture. It's as if it's a little too high for her, and the air gets squished right out of her as she lands. So she lets out this little squeak. But then, the funny part is that Jolee goes "Mrrrrw" every time he jumps up onto something. So maybe it's just personal preference. Haha.

I believe the proper monetary unit to describe how much money I made at work last night is "a shit ton." It's a very technical term. My last two tables tipped me $50 and $75 respectively. That $75 was probably the easiest $75 I've ever made in my life. Anyway I'm off. Going for a drive, to see about some stray cats. Just wish me luck in resisting the urge to collect more kittens...

Tags:

Thursday, February 8, 2007

Netflix Hates On Us

You might have noticed that nearly a week has gone by since I wrote about how newly obsessed I am with Battlestar Galactica. We have one episode left to go in Season One, the conclusion of the two-parter that left us on a cliffhanging note as Starbuck surprised everyone and took off for Caprica (TV Starbuck, not gray furry Starbuck :-P). So what did I think of the season finale?

Oh, that's right. I haven't seen it. We haven't gotten a disc from Netflix in an ENTIRE WEEK. To compare, we usually have a two-day turnaround. Netflix has done an impressive job of being the only mail-related thing not affected by Post-Katrina slowness. Of course, when I really want something, they suddenly decide to experience issues. First we mailed it back right before the weekend, and the folks at Netflix apparently don't work on Saturdays, even though the mail does. Then-- horrors! Apparently they are out of that disc of Battlestar Galactica in Baton Rouge, and it is being sent from Des Moines.

Iowa? Seriously? They can't find a Season One Disc Four anywhere in the south? Argh.

In other news, here are the specs of the new desktop (also being shipped from Somewhere Else, with a mysterious potential arrival date of maybe tomorrow or maybe Saturday):

AMD Athlon 64 Dual Processor 5000+
2 GB RAM
400 GB hard drive
NVIDIA 7600 GS
DVD burner

Which pretty much equates to, wow, this is more space than we will ever, ever need. Oh wait, except I need it to play Oblivion. Because I totally already bought it. I don't know why I wanted this game so much. It just looks really, really, really cool. My lazy ass hasn't even finished Neverwinter Nights, and this game is about five times the length and size. I don't know, there's just something about the ridiculous character customization that makes me geek right out... you can make your character's face right down to the eyebrows.

I don't know, OK? Sometimes people are huge geeks, and they want hugely geeky toys. Leave me alone.

Tuesday, February 6, 2007

Sweetie One Ups Me in the Game of Life

... by reporting that he is getting $4,700 back from the federal government. That sort of makes my $720 look like petty cash, does it not? But it will allow us to buy the backup desktop we've been thinking about buying this month, which is cool. I got Lego Star Wars for Christmas but I can't really play it on our semi-defunct backup laptop. Which is a bummer because we have this huge monitor for gaming and stuff, but the laptop has a CD drive that barely works, no LCD screen, and is otherwise on its last leg. I also can't run anything from the last couple of years on my own laptop, which is an IBM Thinkpad T30 purchased in 2003.

I think I have mentioned before that my only goal in life is to someday own a computer that can run this.

So, in case you were not previously aware of this fact, Sweetie officially wins at life. And he bought groceries this month, even though it was my turn. Because he is just That Awesome. Thanks. Bye.

Sunday, February 4, 2007

Stupor Bowl Sunday

I don't know, there is something about football in the background of my typing that makes me feel overheated and vaguely drugged. I have no idea why. I like football well enough when I am paying attention to it. But as background noise? It causes me to zone. Maybe it's the stupidity of the announcers. I don't feel this way about hockey. You can always hear pucks zinging around and Canadian accents and it's sort of happy and icy...

We hate the Bears, so we're satisfied that they lost. I would just like to throw out there that, this summer, I poured Peyton Manning some water. True story. Because he and his mom ate lunch at my restaurant. (They live here.) But I totally would not have caught on that it was him if all the guys I work with hadn't been drooling over him. He wasn't as tall as I expected.

We didn't get our Battlestars yesterday, and we probably won't get them until Tuesday. Color me pissed! Now I'm going to make tuna melts, I think. Is it 11:00? Our rations are in a terribly dire state. We have no food. But fortunately, all I need is tuna, cheese, and bread, and those I have.

Friday, February 2, 2007

In Which My Mutant Cat Grows More Toes

I really, really, really don't want to talk about the hour leading up to Jolee's checkup. Suffice it to say that there were tears... I cried (extreme frustration), he cried (panic), everyone cried and yelled, and some of us kicked others of us in the thigh and left a huge scrape. It was a thankfully uneventful appointment, once the cat was in the carrier. Totally immobilized by fear, he behaved perfectly. They took him out to give him his shots and remove his two mats. Then the vet called me into the back room of secrecy (where three people strap your pet down by the scruff of the neck and don't let you watch)... to show me the new toe he discovered on Jolee's right foot! I thought he had seven on each, but apparently he has eight on one and seven on the other. He officially has the most toes my vet has seen. Aw. He's my little mutant.

However, I need to either find a way to clip the toenail on the one in the middle underneath his foot, or bring him in every 4 months for them to do it, or else it will grow into his skin and he'll get an abcess (ew). Seeing as I had never even seen that toe before today, I'm not sure I can get to it. I can't wait.




Jolee, show the nice people your mutant feet. 5+5+7+8 = a grand total of 25 toes. The current Guinness Record cat has 28.

Various

I have to take the Alpha Fluffball to the vet for his annual shots and checkup this morning, so I am drinking coffee and gearing myself up to be shredded. (The last time this happened, it took two of us to herd him, and he scratched up my hands, and I ended up giving up on the real carrier, because he kept planting his feet and backing out of it, so I dropped him into the cardboard temporary box that he came in. Why aren't pet carriers top loading??) I think the key is to catch him by surprise the first time. Because once he wiggles away the first time and gets wind of what's going on, it's going to be hell getting him in that box. I am not taking the baby cat, even though she still needs some kitten shots, because he is going to be a big enough handful on his own (though surprisingly meek when he gets there, due to his debilitating fear of all people). The vet's office is only five minutes away. It's not out of my way to go back next week.

Let's talk Battlestar Galactica, henceforth to be known as Battlestar Cracktica. Because they are like crack, I tell you, like crack. So here's my annoyance with DVDs. We have one episode left in Season One, and it is on a disc BY ITSELF. This wouldn't be such an annoyance if we weren't ordering them from Netflix. It's a waste of a whole disc. Star Trek: Enterprise pulled this on us too-- the last disc with one episode and a bunch of features. You know they could squeeze it onto the previous disc if they wanted to. It's sort of like the concept of the Season Finale in itself: it will be a cliffhanger, there will only be one of it, and you will not be able to get your hands on another episode for a long, long time. But DVDs shouldn't mimic actual TV! It's why I watch DVDs and not actual TV.

So the 12 colonies of Kobol all have the names of the zodiac signs. Caprica= Capricorn. Gemenon= Gemini. Picon= Pisces. I can't help thinking this is going to become significant in leading us to Earth. Right? Because the zodiac signs represent constellations that have a certain bearing with regard to the planet Earth. (If I'm right or wrong, don't tell me! I'm on Kobol's Last Gleaming, Part I. This is all I've seen! I've already read enough about the show online to spoil most of the surprises, so don't tell me about Earth!) Oh! And also-- there are 12 of everything. There are 12 serpents in the vision, 12 Vipers, 12 Cylon models, 12 colonies, etc. Has to be connected somehow.

I loved how Starbuck punched Lee in the face and he punched her right back. There was no nonsense about "hitting a girl." So now she meets up with Helo on Caprica (obviously-- the whole point of her going there is to bring the two plot arcs together. I mean, it's to get this arrow, but really it's to bring two plot arcs together), and is going to realize immediately that there are two Sharons. That should be fun. Oh, straggling 13th episode... get here tomorrow!

Oh boy. Jolee just leaped two and a half feet into the air over Starbuck. He has way too much energy this morning. Help.

Thursday, February 1, 2007

Omigod! Omigod! Omigod! I've Been Saved!

First let me tell you about the dark cloud that's been figuratively hanging over my head as I awaited the arrival of my dreaded W2. As I've mentioned, I wait tables part-time, which allows me to make roughly 130% more money than I made in my full-time legal secretary job B.K. (Before Katrina, for those not in the know. It's like B.C. and A.D.). Mostly this is because I pocket between $400-700 a week in cash. I am also "paid" a sort-of salary of $2 an hour, from which my taxes are deducted so I receive a paycheck of $0 every two weeks. The huge catch in the wonderful waterfall of hundreds and twenties that is waitressing is the part where you have to pay taxes at the end of the year. This is the first year in which waiting tables was my only job, so I was very anxious to see how things would shake down. I do declare my tips to my employer, but I claim them using a personal formula I came up with, of which I am not certain the United States government would approve (this would be a good place for George W. to talk about liberals and their "fuzzy math").

Anyhow, I sat down right away to see how much damage I was going to take. At first glance, it wasn't going well. I watched nervously as the little ticker number at the edge of the TurboTax screen dropped a hundred bucks into the red. Crap. But wait! I wasn't finished! Because lo, I am a graduate student who pays her own tuition out of pocket. I am here to tell you that, in the eyes of the IRS, this is the most taxably amazing thing you can possibly do. I hit "Optimize Education Credits" and the number jumped into the green. My heart leapt! And then-- it did not stop! It scrolled all the way up to 1,029, where it decided its work was done and proceeded to stick.

I GET 1,000! I GET 1,000!**

In other news, I'm taking a shower now. It seems like every time I get off my butt to participate in Thursday Thirteen, Google/Blogger experiences server issues. I haven't been able to load other people's blogs, nor can they see mine without that error message. Go figure. :Shrug:

**We can talk about the $288 I owe the State of Louisiana later. Like in May when I actually file my state return at the last second. I'm not letting the State of Louisiana shit on my parade!!!

Thirteen First Lines


... from 13 Books I love. Can you guess what they're from? This was fun. It amuses me that some of them are so obvious and some of them might as well be from anything. (Hint: OK, less than half of them are SF/F, so that should make it easier.)

1. "We slept in what had once been the gymnasium."

2. "Lessa woke, cold."

3. "The beet is the most intense of vegetables."

4. "It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife."

5. "In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit."

6. "Early in the morning, late in the century, Cricklewood Broadway."

7. "Mr. and Mrs. Dursley, of number four, Privet Drive, were proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much."

8. "The doctor woke up afraid."

9. "'We should start back,' Gared urged as the woods began to grow dark around them."

10. "Far out in the uncharted backwaters of the unfashionable end of the Western Spiral arm of the Galaxy lies a small unregarded yellow sun."

11. "Once there were four children whose names were Peter, Susan, Edmund, and Lucy."

12. "A green and yellow parrot, which hung in a cage outside the door, kept repeating over and over, 'Allez vous-en! Allez vous-en! Sapristi! That's all right!'"

13. "124 was spiteful."

(1. The Handmaid's Tale, Margaret Atwood. 2. Dragonflight, Anne McCaffrey. 3. Jitterbug Perfume, Tom Robbins. 4. Pride and Prejudice, Jane Austen. 5. The Hobbit, J.R.R. Tolkien. 6. White Teeth, Zadie Smith. 7. Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone, J.K. Rowling. 8. The Witching Hour, Anne Rice. 9. A Game of Thrones, George R.R. Martin. 10. The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Douglas Adams. 11. The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe, C.S. Lewis. 12. The Awakening, Kate Chopin. 13. Beloved, Toni Morrison.)

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